In the Green Valley by Jarek Adams

(To be read out loud in a South Wales Valleys accent)

I add a baaaby

i woz a gorjus ikle thin

I cwched up to er airvry nite

wile she did ave a suck at me

I called er Blodeuedd

the farmer called er mint sorce

silly bugger

talks to me like ee’s my butty sumtimz

E cum rownd with is missis

a rite chopsy bugger

a bit twpt if ewe arsk me

norutorl nice

She pointed to my baaaby un sed

‘be luvverly with moron und pys’

I coon’t buleev my years

I wuz fewmin

I told er, ‘go waaay’

she sed, ‘ark at er

ew d’yew think ewe are?’

‘Thas rite, a bloody ewe I sed!’

I did a crap rite in frunt of er

she gor i on er shoo

and bloody moaned

‘wor a lor of do do they do do’ she sed

Wen I lookt rownd ee’d taken my baaaby

I was fewrius I can tell ewe

iss not wot ew’d call a gud life

next eel be takin the bloody coat off my back

KEY:

Cwch - cuddle

Butty - friend

Chopsy - talkative

Twpt - daft

Moron - carrots

Pys - peas

Jarek Adams